Yesterday I came home from work and found Kyra had passed away in the few hours between when R left and I arrived home.
I took her to the vet, and R left work early and came to meet me. We made arrangements for her, and said goodbye.
The past 7 years and the past few weeks have truly been a precious time that we had together with a special little kitty.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
In the beginning...
We had just gotten a new car and were out driving around on a hot summer day in July 2001. We were driving by a convenience store (at 45mph) when I looked in the parking lot and saw a cat under a truck. I said "Wow, there's a cat under the truck in that parking lot!"
R asked "How did you see that? Do you want to go back?" I said "no" then "Maybe." So he turned around and we headed back. I expected that the cat would run from me, but instead she came to me. She was very affectionate and VERY dirty.
I went in the store and asked about the cat, but the store owner didn't know anything. She came into the car willingly but then cried so mournfully the whole way home. We brought her in and isloated her from the other cats. She was very hungry and very dirty. I combed and combed her to try to get the mats out of her fur as well as the burrs.
The next day we noticed she was limping, and I took her to the vet. Both the vet and I were disgusted to find that someone had declawed her AND dumped her. It turned out she had a bite on her leg and needed antibiotic. I couldn't stand the thought of taking her to even a no-kill shelter while she was not fully healthy so I started giving her the meds. After 10 days of antibiotic we had fully bonded and her tests indicated she was healthy.
She started out living in our bedroom closet. She was super shy and played, and enjoyed some petting but didn't want to socialize much. Then in September, R had neck surgery. He was home from work sleeping and recovering. Somehow Kyra knew he needed company, and she came out of the closet and snuggled with him.
Soon she became a bit more confident, snuggling with us while we slept. When we had a smaller bed, she would share my pillow, and when we had a bigger bed, she had her own spot between our pillows. She loved us both, was fiercely independent, and R was definitely HER person.
R asked "How did you see that? Do you want to go back?" I said "no" then "Maybe." So he turned around and we headed back. I expected that the cat would run from me, but instead she came to me. She was very affectionate and VERY dirty.
I went in the store and asked about the cat, but the store owner didn't know anything. She came into the car willingly but then cried so mournfully the whole way home. We brought her in and isloated her from the other cats. She was very hungry and very dirty. I combed and combed her to try to get the mats out of her fur as well as the burrs.
The next day we noticed she was limping, and I took her to the vet. Both the vet and I were disgusted to find that someone had declawed her AND dumped her. It turned out she had a bite on her leg and needed antibiotic. I couldn't stand the thought of taking her to even a no-kill shelter while she was not fully healthy so I started giving her the meds. After 10 days of antibiotic we had fully bonded and her tests indicated she was healthy.
She started out living in our bedroom closet. She was super shy and played, and enjoyed some petting but didn't want to socialize much. Then in September, R had neck surgery. He was home from work sleeping and recovering. Somehow Kyra knew he needed company, and she came out of the closet and snuggled with him.
Soon she became a bit more confident, snuggling with us while we slept. When we had a smaller bed, she would share my pillow, and when we had a bigger bed, she had her own spot between our pillows. She loved us both, was fiercely independent, and R was definitely HER person.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
ups and downs
Kyra is still hangin in there. Her mood is good, we've found some foods she will eat on her own, and we are hand feeding her twice a day. It's definitely sad to have a sick pet, but I am focusing on enjoying the time all of us spend together.
Also, the other two are getting lots of love from us too. They know something is wrong with Kyra, and mostly avoid her, but since she is getting so much attention from us, we're making sure to give them extra attention too.
I've found some great syringes at Walgreen's that make the feeding go much smoother, and I also picked up some disposable Pampers bibs, which helps control the messiness. Not only is it less messy but it means less cleanup afterwards, and cleaning messy food from a furry kitty face is challenging.
Her current meds are prednisone and marin, which contains milk thistle and vitamin E, and is supposed to provide natural support. We are always looking at her ears and eyes to see if the jaundice has decreased, and intermittently I think it's improved or hasn't changed. It's hard, cause I definitely WANT to see it change, I just don't know if it is.
Also, the other two are getting lots of love from us too. They know something is wrong with Kyra, and mostly avoid her, but since she is getting so much attention from us, we're making sure to give them extra attention too.
I've found some great syringes at Walgreen's that make the feeding go much smoother, and I also picked up some disposable Pampers bibs, which helps control the messiness. Not only is it less messy but it means less cleanup afterwards, and cleaning messy food from a furry kitty face is challenging.
Her current meds are prednisone and marin, which contains milk thistle and vitamin E, and is supposed to provide natural support. We are always looking at her ears and eyes to see if the jaundice has decreased, and intermittently I think it's improved or hasn't changed. It's hard, cause I definitely WANT to see it change, I just don't know if it is.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
blood work update
so I spoke to the vet, he said her red blood cell count is down, indicating she could have an autoimmune issue going on.
i'm headed there after work, I'll be doubly making sure that it's not something the others can contract, and picking up more meds and food for her.
R and I will continue with our regimen for now, and see how it goes.
i'm headed there after work, I'll be doubly making sure that it's not something the others can contract, and picking up more meds and food for her.
R and I will continue with our regimen for now, and see how it goes.
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Went for a re-check at the vet
He hasn't seen us since we were discharged for our crazy road trip. He was honest with me and said he was surprised to see her still with us. He's concerned she is still pretty yellow (jaundice) and is re-checking her blood, we will have results tomorrow.
He also gave her some B12, and depending on the bloodwork may put us on prednisone.
Everyone at the vet office was super sweet to me and Kyra.
I'll update tomorrow when I get the bloodwork results.
He also gave her some B12, and depending on the bloodwork may put us on prednisone.
Everyone at the vet office was super sweet to me and Kyra.
I'll update tomorrow when I get the bloodwork results.
Monday, October 20, 2008
another sickie in the family
yesterday we realized R has shingles. I cried. Mostly because we are both trying to be so strong for each other and for the kitty. I knew we were both stressed, but to me his shingles is a clear indicator that it's taking a physical toll on him. And I feel bad. He's also stressed about returning to work after his injury, and the increased appointments for physical therapy and other doctor follow-ups. It just means needing to be up and out earlier than normal, and having even longer days than usual.
I left the living room where Kyra was chillin on the couch, cause I didn't want to upset her by crying. Within a few minutes, both of the other kitties were on the bed with me. They were worried that I was crying. Such sweet pets we have.
A good note about Kyra, she is drinking some water on her own, and pooping almost daily. There were some tense days where we waited for her to poop, but now she seems to be a bit more regular.
Tomorrow is the follow up blood test at the vet, and I am anxious about it. We need to know the information it provides to see if she's fighting this illness, but I know I will feel sad if her numbers are worse from the last check. I'm trying to prepare myself for whatever the outcome is, and not to obsess about it, cause my stressing won't change it.
I left the living room where Kyra was chillin on the couch, cause I didn't want to upset her by crying. Within a few minutes, both of the other kitties were on the bed with me. They were worried that I was crying. Such sweet pets we have.
A good note about Kyra, she is drinking some water on her own, and pooping almost daily. There were some tense days where we waited for her to poop, but now she seems to be a bit more regular.
Tomorrow is the follow up blood test at the vet, and I am anxious about it. We need to know the information it provides to see if she's fighting this illness, but I know I will feel sad if her numbers are worse from the last check. I'm trying to prepare myself for whatever the outcome is, and not to obsess about it, cause my stressing won't change it.
Saturday, October 18, 2008
maybe, maybe not
for the past few days it seemed like Kyra's appetite was increasing, she was eating more on her own. Today she wasn't as interested in food, she ate a small amount this morning but when she hadn't eaten her normal amount by lunchtime we did a handfeed. I hope she can keep fighting, but if she can't, we won't let her starve.
Sigh.
It's so hard.
Sigh.
It's so hard.
Friday, October 17, 2008
Seeing more of our kitty
Obviously we are feeling cautiously optimistic/hopeful, but starting yesterday afternoon, we started seeing Kyra acting a little more like the Kyra we know so well. I came into the living room yesterday after going to the store, and started looking in her hiding spots for her. She was sitting on the comfy chair. I know that sounds sort of mundane, but when we are not putting her on the couch or bed, she is usually hiding somewhere and dozing.
This morning when we got up, she was sleeping on the couch. Small victories!
We also noticed she has a way of sleeping when she is sick, it's hard to describe, but you can tell if you know her that she's not sleeping the way she normally does. This morning on the couch she was sleeping in her normal way. :)
Also she is starting to eat a bit more on her own. We've been averaging about 2 teaspoons of food on her own a day. Today before R left for work, she ate about 3 teaspoons of food on her own. When I get home, I will offer her some more.
This morning when we got up, she was sleeping on the couch. Small victories!
We also noticed she has a way of sleeping when she is sick, it's hard to describe, but you can tell if you know her that she's not sleeping the way she normally does. This morning on the couch she was sleeping in her normal way. :)
Also she is starting to eat a bit more on her own. We've been averaging about 2 teaspoons of food on her own a day. Today before R left for work, she ate about 3 teaspoons of food on her own. When I get home, I will offer her some more.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Hangin in there!
Kyra is hangin in there! Whenever we are around, we offer her food. It helps that we have staggered schedules. So far she's been enjoying kitten food a lot, as well as some other fishy kitty food. We track the amounts of foods that she eats so we can get an idea of how many calories she's eating a day, then supplement with the hand feeding. It's ironic to have this kitty who had such an incredible appetite, now need constant encouragement to eat. We mix the kitten food with pedialyte (unflavored) to help make sure she's getting electrolytes. She drinks a bit of water, and I supplement with sub-q fluids. We have a new addition to the care regimen. After we feed her at night, we snuggle with her on the bed, petting her and telling her how much we love her. She eventually gets sick of that and goes to hide under the bed, but we want her to have that positive snuggle experience after the feeding.
It's tough to make good cat mom decisions. I think about when I was a kid, I don't even imagine the vet would have been able to recommend sonograms and all kinds of diagnostic tests. Vet medicine has advanced so much in my lifetime, but we still have to make a decision on what is best for her, for all of our cats, and for us. I think about quality of life for all of us, and I have to think about finances, especially in this economy.
I spent a lot of time stressing about when would be "the time to say goodbye." I shared this with my therapist and she encouraged me to take it easy on that topic, and that R and I will know when that time is, whether it is soon, or down the road. All we can do for now is give her our best, and our love.
I have an appointment on Tuesday with our regular vet, who was away this week, for a re-check of her blood. Hopefully her increased eating has had a good impact on her system. I went over to the vet's office today to pick up some more fluids, syringes, and meds cause some of them got sort of pulverized. Everyone there was super sweet, and asked about how she was doing.
One decision I'm so glad we made, was bringing her home. Although this week has been difficult and emotional, it's been so good to have her here, spend time with her, and talk with her.
It's tough to make good cat mom decisions. I think about when I was a kid, I don't even imagine the vet would have been able to recommend sonograms and all kinds of diagnostic tests. Vet medicine has advanced so much in my lifetime, but we still have to make a decision on what is best for her, for all of our cats, and for us. I think about quality of life for all of us, and I have to think about finances, especially in this economy.
I spent a lot of time stressing about when would be "the time to say goodbye." I shared this with my therapist and she encouraged me to take it easy on that topic, and that R and I will know when that time is, whether it is soon, or down the road. All we can do for now is give her our best, and our love.
I have an appointment on Tuesday with our regular vet, who was away this week, for a re-check of her blood. Hopefully her increased eating has had a good impact on her system. I went over to the vet's office today to pick up some more fluids, syringes, and meds cause some of them got sort of pulverized. Everyone there was super sweet, and asked about how she was doing.
One decision I'm so glad we made, was bringing her home. Although this week has been difficult and emotional, it's been so good to have her here, spend time with her, and talk with her.
Monday, October 13, 2008
Hand feeding
The treatment for fatty liver disease is to get the cat to eat so that the body stops trying to use the cat's fat stores for fuel.
I can't describe the specifics of it, but just share that it's ironic to be hand feeding this cat who used to clean all the other cats' food dishes.
I wanted to post a little bit about hand feeding. I read on the internet that vets are often doubtful that owners can deal with the challenge of hand feeding. Now that we've been doing it for a few days, I completely understand their reluctance. I'm committed to feeding her. The alternative is a surgically placed feeding tube, which we are not sure we could do, but even if we could, right now she is in no condition to have surgery.
When it's time to feed her, we get the food ready, adding warm water and now some unflavored pedialyte to her food, and syringing it into her mouth in small amounts. Once it is wet and can be sucked up in a syringe, we get ready. I sit on the bathroom floor and put a towel over my lap. I hold Kyra in my lap and use one hand to open her mouth and the other to syringe small amounts of food onto her tongue so she swallows it. Then I repeat. A few spoons full of food mixed with water equals A LOT of food and syringes. We take breaks, I pet her, talk to her, tell her how much I love her and how good she's doing. We both wind up covered in wet cat food, but most of it gets into her little belly. It's tough to do, but I know this is her shot, and I'm committed to it. She doesn't like it, but she is so sweet and goes along with it. When I tried it at the vet last week, she shook her head a lot and sprayed food all over. She's not doing that now, she's been so awesome. In a way, even though we both don't like it, it's a nice time for us to spend together, and R is there as my aide, refilling the syringes and offering support.
I can't describe the specifics of it, but just share that it's ironic to be hand feeding this cat who used to clean all the other cats' food dishes.
I wanted to post a little bit about hand feeding. I read on the internet that vets are often doubtful that owners can deal with the challenge of hand feeding. Now that we've been doing it for a few days, I completely understand their reluctance. I'm committed to feeding her. The alternative is a surgically placed feeding tube, which we are not sure we could do, but even if we could, right now she is in no condition to have surgery.
When it's time to feed her, we get the food ready, adding warm water and now some unflavored pedialyte to her food, and syringing it into her mouth in small amounts. Once it is wet and can be sucked up in a syringe, we get ready. I sit on the bathroom floor and put a towel over my lap. I hold Kyra in my lap and use one hand to open her mouth and the other to syringe small amounts of food onto her tongue so she swallows it. Then I repeat. A few spoons full of food mixed with water equals A LOT of food and syringes. We take breaks, I pet her, talk to her, tell her how much I love her and how good she's doing. We both wind up covered in wet cat food, but most of it gets into her little belly. It's tough to do, but I know this is her shot, and I'm committed to it. She doesn't like it, but she is so sweet and goes along with it. When I tried it at the vet last week, she shook her head a lot and sprayed food all over. She's not doing that now, she's been so awesome. In a way, even though we both don't like it, it's a nice time for us to spend together, and R is there as my aide, refilling the syringes and offering support.
so here's what's been going on
part of the stress on Friday was that we were leaving with our friends A & G for a wedding in Vermont of very dear friends K & N. A & G are also cat people and were super supportive and understanding of us. We picked up Kyra and took a road trip with her and our friends. We were prepared with her food, meds, and fluids, and we also prepared for losing her at some point during the weekend.
A little wrinkle in our plan, our hotel which we pre-paid, did not allow pets. We worried that leaving her there, she might get stressed out and cry, and give away our secret. So began our awesome team effort of covert ops to conceal the cat. With the cooperation of A & G, and the bride's brother, we were able to keep Kyra relatively comfortable and didn't give away our secret. During the wedding, Kyra stayed in the bride's brother's bathroom. (the hotel where the wedding was ...allowed pets). She definitely didn't love the car trip but we got a lot of quality time with her and our friends, it was really special. Ideally I wouldn't recommend taking a road trip with a sick cat, but if you had to do it, A & G are seriously the people to do it with.
I know some people thought we were crazy, but we were faced with a difficult decision and I felt confident that we needed to try our treatment.
A little wrinkle in our plan, our hotel which we pre-paid, did not allow pets. We worried that leaving her there, she might get stressed out and cry, and give away our secret. So began our awesome team effort of covert ops to conceal the cat. With the cooperation of A & G, and the bride's brother, we were able to keep Kyra relatively comfortable and didn't give away our secret. During the wedding, Kyra stayed in the bride's brother's bathroom. (the hotel where the wedding was ...allowed pets). She definitely didn't love the car trip but we got a lot of quality time with her and our friends, it was really special. Ideally I wouldn't recommend taking a road trip with a sick cat, but if you had to do it, A & G are seriously the people to do it with.
I know some people thought we were crazy, but we were faced with a difficult decision and I felt confident that we needed to try our treatment.
Saturday, October 11, 2008
crazy cat people
we've achieved crazy cat people status, and i am OK with it.
i picked up some kitten food for k-bert and she ate it on her own!!
we've been supplementing what she'll eat on her own with the prescription food, hand feeding her. we've got a good system for the drugs, fluid, and food going, and she's being a champ.
i haven't seen a marked improvement in her but she does seem more relaxed with us than when we saw her at the vet. we're having a wonderful weekend with friends and the cat.
i picked up some kitten food for k-bert and she ate it on her own!!
we've been supplementing what she'll eat on her own with the prescription food, hand feeding her. we've got a good system for the drugs, fluid, and food going, and she's being a champ.
i haven't seen a marked improvement in her but she does seem more relaxed with us than when we saw her at the vet. we're having a wonderful weekend with friends and the cat.
Friday, October 10, 2008
decisions
you might think we're crazy, and we might be, but we had a 6am cry fest and discussion. we decided that we will move forward with a full fledged fatty liver treatment, with us doing the treatment. our instincts are telling us that we want the chance to care for her and provide emotional support, and the chance to receive treatment outside the hospital. we will revisit the sono option depending on how the weekend of fluid and food goes.
if we can't help get her a little more healthy then we will have at least had some time where we were able to hold her and give her loving and a familiar environment. we're committed to not being selfish or torturing her with unnecessary procedures and poking. we want her to be comfortable and less scared.
i'll keep updating as i can.
if we can't help get her a little more healthy then we will have at least had some time where we were able to hold her and give her loving and a familiar environment. we're committed to not being selfish or torturing her with unnecessary procedures and poking. we want her to be comfortable and less scared.
i'll keep updating as i can.
Thursday, October 9, 2008
not good news
so the results came back from the blood test. her bilirubin levels are up from Monday's bloodwork, which indicates that her liver is not functioning properly. The vet wants us to have an ultrasound tomorrow to determine if there is a mass.
We went over to see her, took her favorite toy blue crab, and some catnip and treats. She wasn't interested in any of them, but she did rub on blue crab a little. We left blue crab with her for the night. We gave her lots of love and talked with the vet some more. I explained that we want to do the right thing for her and not be selfish, and put her through too much just cause we don't want to lose her. He understood and told us that if it's cancer, then we probably shouldn't pursue further treatment, but if it is not cancer, then we have some hope of treatment.
We're both really sad.
We went over to see her, took her favorite toy blue crab, and some catnip and treats. She wasn't interested in any of them, but she did rub on blue crab a little. We left blue crab with her for the night. We gave her lots of love and talked with the vet some more. I explained that we want to do the right thing for her and not be selfish, and put her through too much just cause we don't want to lose her. He understood and told us that if it's cancer, then we probably shouldn't pursue further treatment, but if it is not cancer, then we have some hope of treatment.
We're both really sad.
Brief update Thursday afternoon
I spoke with the tech this morning. She was super sweet and reassuring. They have been hand feeding her to make sure she's eating, and Kyra was very vocal this morning.
I talked with the doctor around noon. He said they are going to run another blood test to determine her levels of bilirubin before determining next steps.
I called a little bit ago and they said they were running the test and would call me back soon.
Sigh.
I talked with the doctor around noon. He said they are going to run another blood test to determine her levels of bilirubin before determining next steps.
I called a little bit ago and they said they were running the test and would call me back soon.
Sigh.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
Update 10/8/08 lunchtime
R and I headed over to see Kyra at lunch today. She was a little more perky than yesterday, and was really happy to see us and get some attention. She really wanted to get out of the cage!
She has pooped (a small victory i think), and remains on fluids and antibiotics. I noticed that she was still sort of yellow in the ears. I've tried not to do too much internet research, but a quick search told me that the jaundice can take a while to clear up. I know both of us were hoping that she'd be back to herself and not yellow, but it's good to know that it's a process. I did a little syringe feeding, and they told me they would do some more. I didn't want to give her too much food and make her vomit, poor girl!
The doc is going to re-check her bilirubin levels tomorrow, which will give an indication if there is an improvement from Saturday's blood test. It's hard to keep waiting, and not having difinitive answers, but it's good to see small improvements and that she's being well cared for.
She has pooped (a small victory i think), and remains on fluids and antibiotics. I noticed that she was still sort of yellow in the ears. I've tried not to do too much internet research, but a quick search told me that the jaundice can take a while to clear up. I know both of us were hoping that she'd be back to herself and not yellow, but it's good to know that it's a process. I did a little syringe feeding, and they told me they would do some more. I didn't want to give her too much food and make her vomit, poor girl!
The doc is going to re-check her bilirubin levels tomorrow, which will give an indication if there is an improvement from Saturday's blood test. It's hard to keep waiting, and not having difinitive answers, but it's good to see small improvements and that she's being well cared for.
Tuesday, October 7, 2008
Small update 10/7/08 2pm
Hubby went to see Kyracat today at the vet's office. He said she looks better, but still looks like she doesn't feel well. She was happy to see him and wanted some petting, which is a definite improvement from our perspective. She has eaten a bit of food and urinated, but no poop yet...
Monday, October 6, 2008
The problem
So on Thursday evening Kyra refused dinner. This kept up through Friday, and on Saturday we headed to the vet. It was clear something was wrong, she was sad, reclusive, and not interested in eating. This cat ALWAYS eats. The vet took a blood test and sent us home with a low dose antibiotic to provide support if she was fighting an infection.Because she was dehydrated, I gave her sub-Q fluids, thanks to my friend K who has vet tech experience and had the supplies.
The blood work came back today and the vet said it indicated something wrong with her liver. They are keeping her overnight, on IV fluids and meds. They x-rayed to see if there was a tumor, and it wasn't fully conclusive due to some swelling in the GI tract. So far it's looking good for no tumor, but not definitive.
Sigh. It's so hard to have a sick animal. My heart is just breaking, I hate not having her here, I can't explain to her what's going on, etc. Our vet is really sweet and I feel confident that she's in good hands. I hope we'll have some more info on her prognosis tomorrow. Positive thoughts and prayers are appreciated.
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